Confession: the reason I started this blog was I wanted to create a space outside of social media. A space to hang out, share thoughts and ideas and be present without the awkward guy in the corner being extremely inappropriate.
When I say "awkward guy" I am referring to the aspect of social media that is just trying to get your attention, make you think you need things you don't, make you obsessed with likes and follows, make you forget who you are and what is really important to you.
Don't get me wrong- social can be quite SOCIAL; it was intended to connect us after all. You can catch up with old friends, meet new ones- be inspired, gain knowledge, and learn from people you wouldn't normally get to hear from. And SHARE. Share who you are and what you are about- that is very exciting to me. But then that guy shows up and things get gross - and speaking personally, it's not good for my mental health.
So I've come up with a few strategies on how to navigate social and I want to share with you. Maybe they will be helpful.
1) Before going on any social platform, I check in with myself to see how I am feeling. I assess my mood and make a mental note of it.
2) I get on quickly and do my business. I don't scroll. Or swipe. I stay focussed on whatever task I intended to do and I do it.
3) After I completed my task, I scroll down and make positive comment or like to the first five accounts that I see- usually accounts of women I follow, women I love.
4) Then I might click on a few inspirational accounts- accounts that are often artists creating their wonderful art or people sharing motivationally good stuff. (Sometimes this is also in the form of animals; beavers carrying vegetables or bears rolling over.)
5) I get off social. Put my phone in airplane mode so I'm not tempted to mindlessly get back on. And then I check in with myself. Am I feeling better or worse? Did that experience enrich me, did I learn something? I make a mental note of how I feel. Because becoming aware of your feelings and social media's influence on them is really powerful. You can make changes that way and ultimately learn that you have more control. I've learned that I have more control than I thought.
6) And my last strategy- get a buddy. If I accidentally fell into a "social worm hole" ('cause even on the best of days, it can happen) and I'm left feeling awful: jealous, left out, insecure, lost, unmotivated etc. I call my "buddy". A real person that knows and loves me (usually Rachie). And she will remind me how extraordinary I am. And that what I am doing is important work that only I can do. She will make me laugh and pump me up, in real time. And I will remember the truth. That we ALL are extraordinary humans. We are not alone. This is not all there is. And what we bring to this world is important and special and infinitely larger than the smallness of a screen.
I assure you, at the end of your life you will never say "I wish I spent more time on social media"
love you. Jean
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